About a month ago I was asked by PC Staff if I wanted to attend a training on diversity and I accepted. I had no information on what to expect besides it will be in Pristina and take a whole day. So when the day came I was excited to see what exactly would be the topics of discussion and how those discussion were going to be facilitated. The Intercultural Competence, Diversity & Inclusion (ICD&I) Training was given by facilitated by two Peace Corps Staff members from Washington, and I couldn't have even expected what had occurred after.
We arrived to the hotel the day before our training, so we could meet the facilitators and get to know them a little. Both facilitators are Returned Peace Corps Volunteers (RPCVs) and seemed really interested in getting to know who we were and where we stood as currently serving volunteers. The day of the training we began with a slideshow, simply outlining what they did as PC HQ Staff and what the purpose of their work was. We began with an activity describing the difference between equity and equality; the difference being quality is that all people get the same thing (not necessarily comfortable or fitting) and equity is getting the same thing but it is comfortable and effective. The activity was switching shoes of participants to show the differences. We also learned participated in activities where we identified pictures that defined our values and self descriptors, an activity called freeze and also a conversation activity where we talked about single stories and things which made us uncomfortable. in addition to activities our sessions included watching a TedTalk by Nigerian author Chimamanda Ngozi Adiche, and discussing topics such as approaching differences, how to properly identify culture differences (i.e. Power distance, context culture, communication etc.)
Throughout all of these sessions and activities there were shifts in the feeling of the room. We were really able to be vulnerable with each other and realize that everyone is fighting a battle, rather it appears physically or not. Because the room involved volunteers from a variety of minority groups, LGBT, Racial and religious differences, it allowed us to get different perspectives, and have some uncomfortable conversations. I want to applaud Peace Corps for creating this initiative and allowing volunteers and staff to come together and learn how to better addresss the needs and wants of a variety of volunteers, rather than just one specific type of volunteer. Not only does it assist volunteers, but it helps to allow staff to recognize their own prejudices etc.
One effect of our training, for me, was being left with an influx of emotions that I hadn't dealt with up to that point, or even realized that I was experiencing. I discussed my emotions, problems, and solutions with staff and I could see how they could also identify better with me after their diversity training, which was awesome!.
I really enjoyed having the opportunity to learn, grow and experience with my fellow volunteers. Attending the training also helped me to understand how our various experiences in various communities affects each volunteer adn our outlooks. Most importantly1 Week and 3 days until my 1 year anniversary of arriving in country! We are getting there!
Don't sleep on yours (life) because there's beauty in the struggle - J. Cole
Saturday, May 28, 2016
Monday, April 11, 2016
Pushim Fever
Having recently returned from my spring break I felt a
strong desire to share my experiences and travel pictures. For break, I
traveled to Thessaloniki, Greece and Belgrade, Serbia. Both locations offered
something completely different and provided me with a small glimpse into the
benefits of my Peace Corps experience thus far and a greater appreciation for
living abroad.
Greece’s second largest city and so
called Gastronomical capital, Thessaloniki is a university town with a rich multicultural
and ethnic makeup. We arrived to Greece and were surprised by the look of the
city. We imagined those pretty postcard pictures we saw online describing
Thessaloniki (Thess as it is called among us volunteers) and were greeted
with a mix between central and western European scenery. Many buildings, much graffiti
and recognizable store brands greeted us after spending hours driving through
plush (beautiful and CLEAN) green space. We both looked at each other a little
confused suggesting we couldn’t be in the correct location, but we were. What
greeted us was similar to what you would see in America before you enter a
downtown area – the “less desirable” areas of a city. However once we walked
further toward the city center the views changed and a bustling city full of
cafes, lots of shopping (YAY) and beautiful people. Thess is not a
stereotypical Greek city, it is more European in style the islands and areas
further south, this is my guess, is where you will find that Greek experience. We
stayed in a downtown apartment close to the sites and shopping areas. We spent
the first day at the mall, saw a movie and sat a small music bar. Throughout the
rest of our 4 days in Thess we indulged in sweets, seafood, Greek foods, lots
of walking and enjoying the views, sounds and breeze that was Thessaloniki. It
was very surprising in Greece that an overwhelming majority of people spoke
English and quite well at that. Coming from a country where many do not it was
surprising to expect English form various merchants, wait staff and people on
the street.
While traveling into and out of
Greece we saw a UNHCR refugee camp near the Greek border. Rows and rows of
tents, and a big banner stating this was a refugee camp. The crisis going on in
western Asian and North African countries has a true impact – on people. They aren’t
just refugees, illegal immigrants, and displaced people. They are HUMANS! There
were also HUMANS sleeping in a public park near the Belgrade bus station. It
was heart breaking to see brown women, men and children stranded. Stuck in a
state of unwavering not knowing what happens next and nowhere to go. So I urge everyone
to not let these victims to become stigmatized in your mind as law-breaking, moral-less,
resource hungry or even terrorists. They are everyday women children and men
escaping a situation in which they have been targeted and are simply looking
for peace and security. I plan on trying to do something to do my part in
supporting my fellow brothers and sisters, as should you.
When we departed from Thessaloniki,
we had a 12-hour day of travel to get to Belgrade, capital city of Serbia. We
traveled from Thessaloniki, to Skopje – had a 1 hour layover, then Skopje to
Nis, Serbia – switched buses and went from Nis to Belgrade. Because of border
disputes with Serbia and their lack of recognition for Kosovo’s independence
one cannot travel thru Kosovo to Serbia but must go around through Macedonia.
We spent two days in Belgrade, the
first we spent just enjoying walking around and going to the Lake there where
we just laid on the rocky “beach” and stood in the water – as it was too cold
to enter. We also did a bar crawl which ended at a house bar which gave us a
sample of the nightlife in Belgrade – it was packed on a Thursday night and
people were ENTERING the space at 3am, when we were leaving. Belgrade is known
in Europe to have one of the best nightlife experiences, especially in the
summer, when we were told we need to return, to experience the boat clubs they
have that will allow you to experience a Serbian Sunrise on the banks of the
Danube or Sava river (both of which wind their way around the city) and where
you won’t dock until 7am. The second day we did a free walking tour where we
saw various sites around the city and were given an early morning shot of Rakia
in traditional Balkan style. We also visited the Serbian /national Bank where
you can take a few free look at the museum and have your picture taken and
placed on Serbian Dinar (complimentary also). We ended our last day with
McDonalds (Way to be American – but to our defense: 1- I find McDonalds abroad
more delicious {I don’t eat them in the states} and 2- we have no chain fast
food in Kosovo, only doners).
Somethings I found very interesting
about Spring break were the politics still occurring between Serbs and Albanians.
On one government building we saw signs referring to the Kosovo Liberation Army
and western multi-state organizations and their dislike of them. We also got a
small insight into the views Serbians have of Kosovo and the effects the conflict
(or lack thereof) had on them. It was very interesting that on the free walking
tour we attended, the guide was a displaced Serbian from Kosovo. Because of the
acts occurring in Kosovo during the late nineties her family migrated from
Kosovo to Belgrade and she spoke briefly on that experience. She did mention
though that she would like to return and visit her former home where she still
has family members. These few chance encounters have definitely further peaked
my interest to returning to Belgrade and other Serbian cities to experience
their culture, people and hear their stories. Other things learned were the appreciation I
now have for knowing a language, even if basic, in Kosovo. It was frustrating
not really knowing how to communicate to Greeks and Serbians in their native
tongues and I felt bad not knowing even some greetings – BUT I now have that
down. I feel one should know at least basic greetings in the native tongue for whatever
destination you are visiting as a sign of respect and appreciation. Secondly, I
am grateful and proud of the progress I have made in Albanian (think I’ve said
this before – Oh well) . I don’t feel (as) lost or uncomfortable, but on the
flipside not knowing the language made the yearning for anonymity to return. In
Kosovo, as a PCV, I have no anonymity and I know what people around me are
conversing about, usually me if I am in their presence in public, and it
definitely takes a mental and emotional toll to always prepare yourself to
mentally get aggravated with people constantly talking or inquiring about you
yet not to you (Albanian culture isn’t direct like American culture). Also, I
am a planner but I have learned how to go with the flow more (I’m sure my
parents and friends will appreciate that when I return).
My travels have opened desires to
further explore this melting pot called the Balkans and see what other
adventures are out there for me to experience. I will definitely say the two
cities I visited were never on my list, but now I have added even more
locations to an ever growing travel list that would have never made it unless I
would have been serving here in Kosovo so Cheers, Gezuar (Albnian), Ziveli
(Serbian) and Stin yeia mas (Greek) to more travel destinations and learning experiences!
Greece Pictures
Boardwalk in Thessaloniki
White Tower
Sitting on the Boardwalk
Thessaloniki street
Ruins in the city center
Old Market stalls
Greek Tavernas
Street View
Arch of Galerius
Rotunda
View from the Monastery
Belgrade Photos
Bohemian street
Bakjrali Mosque
Belgrade Street View
Entrance to Belgrade Fortress
View looking toward the Danube and Sava rivers that meet in Belgrade
Looking toward the city from the Fortress
Sava River
National Theatre
Sign on a government building accusing Kosovo Liberation Army and NATO of wrongdoings.
- Ashley
Politics of Being Woman
“Worse than receiving actual harassment is
the near-constant feeling of anticipation or expectation of harassment. It’s
this feeling of being on guard at all times. This culture of fear has been
created for me, and it makes me feel unsafe in my surroundings even when I’m
not actively being harassed or bothered. I notice that I avoid eye contact with
men when I am in public. I walk past groups of men with my eyes glued to the
ground, hoping that if I don’t look up they won’t speak to me. I turn the
volume up on my headphones, hoping to drown out any stray comments or whistles
that may come my way. I’m alert and always aware of the person that’s
approaching me or sitting next to me. I would consider this behavior paranoid,
except that it’s continually proven to me that I have reason to be worried
about being harassed.”[1]
- Britni de la Cretaz
These words by Britni de la Cretaz, when read struck a chord, as I am
sure it has with many other women. We have all felt the emotions described
above and at some point or continuously have thoughts of “please don’t look at
me”, “Am I promoting harassment with my clothing?” or even “maybe I only look
good if I am “hit on/harassed” by men. My service has provided me with more
awareness to the over-sexualization and misogynistic tendencies men have toward
women, especially women of color abroad. Firstly let me describe the previously
mentioned terms:
Sexualize - make sexual; attribute sex or a sex role to
Misogyny – the hatred or dislike of women
or girls. Misogyny can be manifested in numerous ways, including sexual
discrimination, hostility, male supremacist ideas, belittling of women,
violence against women, and sexual objectification of women.
Harassment - unwelcome and inappropriate
verbal or physical conduct, or coercive behavior, where the behavior is known
or reasonably ought. to be known to be unwanted or welcome
These terms, especially lately, have been used to describe the position
women hold in the minds of some men and the actions of said men. As a female I
have been subjected to such catcalls, harassment and unwanted touching. During
my service I have experienced moments where the shape of my body and having
curves has made me feel embarrassed or uncomfortable due to comments by a range
of men from elders down to thirteen and fourteen year old boys. They have made
crude and inappropriate comments that have made me feel as if I was promoting promiscuity
or dressing in a way that was socially deemed inappropriate (despite being
clothed “appropriately” when these situations occurred). I am also aware that because
of the globalization of hip-hop culture and cultural stereotypes of black and
American women, I receive that much more interest as something “exotic and
foreign”. Add on to that how women are portrayed in music videos and talked
about in songs you have a setup for promoting women only being sexual beings
for a man’s pleasure. I have heard stories from fellow female volunteers who
have said they were outright propositioned for sex. Why this behavior is
considered acceptable among men and boys boggles me. Why do we allow the future
generation of men to regard women as sexual beings and shame/comment on their
appearances when women express their sexuality in the same breath. I recently
read an article which stated that over 30% of Kosovar women feel it is acceptable for
men to verbally harass them, that it is NORMAL. A women’s desirability should
not be placed on her sexuality, or lack thereof. The harassment I have
encountered has made me more of a feminist and allowed me to realize that there
is still so much that needs change in societies across the globe.
I know recently there have been big debates about comments and actions
made by celebrities such as Kim Kardashian, Amber Rose and Ayesha Curry (to
name a few) about what are acceptable actions and fashion for being a “respectable”
woman. We all have our preferences, rather it be more or less modest on
dressing and actions. My question is why, even as fellow women, do we demean
each other for our actions. We are quick to call each other a hoe, prude slut
without understanding we have the ability as well as the right to be
multi-faceted, sexually aware beings. Say for instance, if I decide to dress
conservatively during my 9-5 and then wear clothes which accentuate my womanly
features; why am I demonized for loving, exploring and embracing all facets of
myself? I won’t sit here and lie and say I haven’t been that person at some
point who has questioned if not commented on another women’s wardrobe choice.
However, I have come to the realization, no matter what a woman does or is, she
shouldn’t be criticized, demonized and /or diminished to a single facet of
herself which society deems it is acceptable for her to be. Every woman has a
variety of selves and her most denied, yet desired being is her sexual self. Women
should be encouraged and supported by each other to comfortably express all
their “selves” and embrace how each creates the whole stunning, impressive, magical,
mold shattering masterpiece each women is.
In connection with me service thus far, and my perception of Kosovar village
society, women are expected to be show pieces. Only shown off with and for men,
yet otherwise virtually unseen. I perceive it as the silencing of women’s
experiences and struggles, literally and figuratively. It is interesting how
women have tried to react against such circumstances. For example, I know a
woman who has faced some “backlash” if you would call it for being a “modern
woman” – working, married and successful. Some feel she is not doing her wifely
duties because she is out working and doing something she loves. She assists
with housework, serving and cooking when possible but most is done by her
mother-in-law as it is tradition for new wives to move into her husband’s house,
who usually still lives with his parents. Her wifely duties have also been
commented on in terms of what it takes to keep her husband satisfied and how
she is perceived to have “a lot of work to do” because he is a bigger man. Additionally,
remarks were made referring to her wardrobe because as she is now married she
should dress more “elegantly” instead of wearing what she does. Add on to that
the constant reference to a woman’s weight and size, which I and countless
other women (including the women formerly mentioned), have had referred to (you’re
getting /are fat is a constant comment heard around Kosovo even if the woman is
on the smaller size). Women are not good enough, pretty enough or small enough
it seems. I have mentioned to a friend of mine how I am surprised more Albanian
women don’t have eating/self-esteem disorders because of all the politics
involving their physical appearances in this society.
I just want to instill in my girls, that they are enough. No matter
what society, family or even friends dictate, being themselves is enough. Embracing
differences instead of creating flaws, loving every size and creating a culture
of female acceptance and importance is what is needed. We need to de-stigmatize
a woman who is completely self-aware and embrace that woman and all she
offers. Women and men need to stand up and stand together against misogyny and
promoting self-hate of women and learn to encourage love and support each other
for who and what they are, what how they express their womanly experience.
“Every part of me is a vision of a portrait… of Mona Lisa, Every
part of me is beautiful, And I finally see I'm a work of art, A masterpiece, And
now I see the pretty colors on my canvas, I'm a work of art, a Mona Lisa, I'll share
my picture with the world, Not afraid to let it show anymore”
Masterpiece – Jazmine Sullivan
- Ashley
Below are some links to short articles involving rape and
sexual harassment culture in Kosovo
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)